Key's Keys-"How Performance Kills Authenticity"-August 9th, 2025

***I acknowledge that I work, play, dance, heal and create this newsletter on the unceded territory of the Syilx Okanagan Peoples***

*this newsletter was written and edited by a human, not AI*

Hello, beautiful soul!

How are y’all feeling with this Aquarius full moon and 5 planets all in retrograde? Plus the Lions Gate Portal?

Feeling like you want to crawl out of your skin? Anxiety, disturbed sleep patterns, body aches, exhaustion, mixed in with this ‘I can’t quite put my finger on it’ feeling that something BIG is coming and you are about to break through some old patterns that will change the trajectory of your life? All of this while feeling like you are sinking while moving through really OLD patterns of self abandonment, grief, and anger? You also cannot see clearly what the next steps are, but know you MUST trust how it all unfolds.

This is how I am feeling. If it resonates-I see you.

We always know what needs to be done, the next step that needs to be taken, if we simply quiet our minds and listen. It really is that simple.

Something happened this week and I can feel a new version of myself peeking back at me through the curtains of a successful future timeline and I’ve finally built up the required motivation to take action towards some major changes.

This is huge. I have clarity on the ‘next steps’ and the mental fortitude right now to do everything that needs to be done. I have very clear vision, and it feels as though many pieces are falling into place as I step deeper into flow, and trust the process. It has taken some time to get here, to figure out how to move through the craziness that is our World right now and to figure out what wasn’t working so I could make different choices and step into the life waiting for me.

Here is the 3 part process on how I did it:

PART 1:

• I spent the last 8 months assessing myself to see where exactly I was performing in my life. Not just with others, but how I performed with friends, work, my relationship, in spiritual ceremony, while teaching, all of it. I audited myself for 8 months and allowed all the different identities I had created throughout my life to step forward to perform to the best of their ability so I could meet myself honestly and let as many of them go as possible.

• Every time I identified as performing in some way, I let myself unmask and re-address the situation from an ‘unmasked’ perspective. I asked myself these 3 questions:

1) Why do I feel the need to perform and show this particular version of myself in this situation?

2) What wounding does it hide and what version of myself is using it as protection?

3) Once identified- I go back in to meet that version of myself and ask her what beliefs she needs to change in order to express herself authentically (by NOT performing) in this particular scenario.

I continued with this process and journaled until I had clear answers, then moved on to the second phase.

PART 2:

Now that I’m walking more authentically aligned, I envision myself 3 years from now, already living and walking the life I dream about. I went deep into visualization to really see myself down to the subtle details. These were the questions I asked my now self about the self in three years that i want to embody:

What are my major beliefs around my worthiness to receive?

How do I balance service with self love?

How do I express myself authentically and creatively?

What do I look like, how do I exercise, what clothes do I wear, how do I eat, what does my spiritual practise look like? IMAGINE IT.

Do I drink? Smoke cannabis? How much?

What are my non negotiables with regards to the things I do EVERY DAY to support and show up for myself?

What is my relationship to money and abundance? What does a healthy, abundance attracting mindset around money FEEL like?

How do I tend the discomfort of growth and the pressure of expansion in a World that feels disconnected, judgemental, and afraid? Give detailed actions.

I also wrote out a week’s schedule with all of the habits the future version of me executed and compared it to my current schedule. The gap between the two is where we work in part three.

PART 3:

Here’s the critical part- I had to look at the gap between who I currently am and my life as it presently is and compare it to the future version of me and the behaviours she is committed to that will create the life I want to embody.

When I understood and could bridge what needed to change to get where I wanted to go, I implemented it immediately.

In order to do this and for it to stick, I had to change my mind.

For me, I was carrying an old belief that I simply don’t have the capacity to do all the things that need to be done. The story I wrapped around that was that I don’t have the energy required to make such substantial changes. I don’t have the energy to be consistent (a lot of the changes that I had to make were based around showing up consistently in many facets of my life), but that is just a story. This story was valid at one time- It was birthed from a car accident that completely derailed my life and left me incapacitated and in more pain then I care to reflect on. However- the truth is that I wasn’t that person any more.

How do I know it was just a story? I hadn’t MADE any of the changes to know whether or not I actually had said capacity. I was sabotaging myself before I even began.

This process goes a lot deeper than what I have shared here, but I found that once I started to engage the above steps, it took on a life of it’s own and I was guided to know what the next step, question, or action was required.

One final thing I would like to add about the above process- I changed my mind and became the new me immediately. I add or stack new behaviours every day (small ones daily, large ones twice per week) I decided that I would not allow any emotion to derail me, or allow myself to build any stories around why I couldn’t implement the changes I knew I had to make. I changed my mind by choosing to do so.I decided I would start to live like her. Not everything is done perfectly every day, but the changes are there, in varying amounts each day based on energy levels and priorities.

I’m CONSISTENT. I became the version of me already living the life I am building because I knew what needed to be done, and I changed my mindset around my capacity so it would stick. It might sound impossible, but I assure you, it is not. I have trained my mind through meditation to get here- and it was not easy- it took time. The truth is that you can simply decide you want to change and if you leave the stories out of it, isolate the limiting beliefs and adjust them, and stay consistent with the plan you create by witnessing but not responding to the emotions around it, your life will change dramatically.

This is the definition of loving self discipline as an act of devotion.

As with all things sacred, there also must be space to pause, soften, and allow for imperfection in the process. I ask myself:

“What is the most loving thing I can do right now?”

Your authenticity is limited by performance of any kind, and moving through the above process can help you rebuild your authentic expression in this World.

Here is a clip on performance and authenticity that felt really supportive to me this week:

joseffinspiration

87K followers

View more on Instagram

KEY’S KEY

Performance and authenticity are opposites on the spectrum of self improvement.

If we wish to walk more authentically- we must bring conscientiousness to our behaviours and mindfully call ourselves out when we perform, or mask, in any situation that doesn’t require it. (hint- no situations require it)

To embody this process we must identify the beliefs we carry that ask us to perform, and hide, so we can avoid being seen.

To even begin to get to that place we must decide to stop caring what others think and prioritize how we feel about ourselves, and learn the thoughts, strategies, beliefs and emotions that keep our truest selves locked up and hidden.

Self love says i’m willing to look closely at the things I do that keep me separate from my true essence. Honouring the self asks that we burn down false beliefs and bravely embrace new ones that are more in alignment with our original blueprint- the version of us that knows and expresses inherent worthiness and doesn’t perform for love and acceptance.

This process doesn’t have to look neat or tidy, or ‘look’ any particular way at all- you simply have to say YES.

Just begin- messy, imperfect, on wobbly legs and with an open heart.

Just begin.

This month, I will be moving my work onto Substack to tend a deeper call of sharing writings in the most natural way that I absolutely love doing - and that means writing! This newsletter will be delivered once a month and be shorter in length, with many more posts on Substack that are going to be longer- fuller expressions of my voice where I will write full teachings, channeled messages and deep dives into spiritual concepts all in one space.

Here is the link to subscribe:

(There is a free and paid version!)

Until then (I hope to see you there!), here are the things that have been helping me on my path this week:

MOTIVATION!

This is such a cute goofy clip that honestly helped me get off my duff and get motivated! Please enjoy!

drmaryclaire

3M followers

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WHAT TO EXPECT IN THE NEXT MONTH (and why things have been tough lately)

This clip touches on what the sages teach us- that we are walking among infinite timelines, all available to us based on the choices we make, and we evolve through challenge, or ‘separation’ from creator, god, whatever you call the energy of all that is.

The sages say that the times of darkness are the only times of true free will.

QUOTE I’M CONTEMPLATING

“What is Love? Anything that unifies.”

^{~The Telepathy Tapes}

AYURVEDIC TECHNIQUE TO CLEAR MEMORIES

I’m still working with this technique, and I find it fascinating. Try it out, and let me know how it works for you!

“LONELINESS IS NOT AN EMOTION

This account is FULL of wisdom, I highly recommend you follow her.

As I moved through the grief of losing my beloved and recently departed aunt, I can attest that true emotions can be processed quickly and fully, if you can honour their FULL expression. This is only possible when you remove the stories attached to them, but is applicable to any emotion that requires integration. Here’s the link to the post:

WHAT I’M LISTENING TO (again)

PLEASE- listen to this podcast. It might change your life.

Finding value in this newsletter? Here is a link to check out the Key’s Keys Archives for past newsletters for more support on your spiritual path:

Thank you for being in this community- I am so grateful for you and your incredible Light.